Let’s just dive into it because self-esteem is an interesting topic. Every person has their own unique peculiarities. Each and every one of us gets off on different things. However there is no doubting it that there re common bonds. There are some things that do make us feel better about ourselves. There is no doubt that a lot of it boils down to the individual. We all as people have our own unique disposition there is no doubt about it.
When we talk about self-esteem we have to be careful. Some people naturally have a higher self-esteem than others. That is just the way it is. So it is very difficult to talk about increasing self-esteem because a lot of it depends on the person. That said, not everyone knows what is best for themselves. Often they need to be steered in the right direction. I know for sure throughout my life I have been surprised by others. They have made my life better without me expecting it. We are social animals, we often don’t know what is best for ourselves.
All I can do is provide some ideas. Some of these you might just want to have a look at and keep in mind. Some of them might be useless for you. Who knows, but I am going to give you my two cents:
- Be a part of something – there is no doubt that being a part of something else provides a source of self-esteem. Contributing to something bigger that yourself can give you a sense of purpose. This can be being a member of a sports team, dance group or the camaraderie you get from work. Being a part of something like this allows you to have a laugh and feel as if you are truly a part of something outside of yourself. You are sharing common goals with othe people and that is going to give you a sense of identity. This identity will give you a bit of meaning in life. It might be difficult not to be involved in other activities, some of them that you do by yourself. But there is no doubt that being involved in soe kind of team activitiy is going to really make you feel better about yourself. It will keep you sane and will overall give your self esteem a boost.
- Don’t be too harsh on yourself. – sometimes we can feel as if we do not have enough. Maybe we feel as if our colleagues are outperforming us. Depending on what you’re like as a person this could sometimes leave you feeling inadequate. The best way to curtail this is to be grateful for what you do have. It is insecurities that drive many millionaires to become millionaires. We are competitive beasts and we constantly strive to be better than the next person. We have to remember that as humans we still do very irrational things. Everyone does this. So if you are feeling blue or feeling down, try to pick yourself up. We all get down for whatever reason but a lot of it is kind of like an irrational mood or feeling. The best thing to do is to try and just focus on other things and overcome it.
- Do what people expect you to do – It is the truth that people expect certain things from you. Sometimes we just have to accept our role and go along with it. This may sound a little bit of conformist but it is the truth. You cannot always do whatever you want. If you do what other people want you to do you will no doubt start to feel a lot better about yourself. People will start to smile at you and have a laugh as you start to contribute to a community. There is nothing better than feeling of value. And then best way to get this feeling is to look around you and ask yourself what other people want you to do. It is not conformist, it is about listening to others and finding out what is going to please other people the most.
- Become good at something – Once you have found your place within a community you can start to work on becoming really good at what you do. Let’s be honest, the people who are better at things are usually happier. They contribute more to society, they earn more money, everyone loves them and the list goes on. So why not just focus on your strengths and become a gun? I believe that everyone has a strength that they can contribute to the community. It could be something as simple as you’re a funny person or a good musician. These are actual skills but it is the more important things like communication skills and attitude that will always come to the forefront. What is your energy like? How can you provide value?
- Go with the flow – Often when we are trying too hard things tend to go array. The focus needs to stay on yourself and what you can do to improve. Sometimes trying too hard to help other people actually has a bad impact on our lives. We need to think of others but we cannot lose focus of putting yourself first. After all it is only you who is in control of your actions. When you look towards other people it is a sign of desperation and that creates problems. At other times we can just try to ensure that we at least make sure that we find a way to not lose distraction. Our minds can wander or we can get in a funk . The best way to mitigate that is to sometimes try to ignore other people and look inward at what you are doing. It sounds selfish except it is not really. Regardless of what happen we are social creatures so why wouldn’t you just focus on what you can do?
- Take Care of yourself – Sometimes thinking too much what other people can think can have a bad impact. It is a fine balancing act, but you need to look after yourself whilst taking other people into consideration. That is the perfect formula for personal growth. It is so important that you have the right amount of both. Caring too much about what other people think and they could turn against you. People can be dogs and are competitive, don’t give them that breathing space. The best thing you can do is to know what is right for you. Everyone is different in this regards but you need to know what is the best path that will facilitate growth in self esteem.
- Be yourself – Never should you try to be something you are not. Embrace your own self. Why would you not want to be yourself? Maybe it is because you are trying to fit in with a crowd. A common reason is that you do not have a healthy physiology. You could be lashing out at the world left, right and centre. Someone like this is not in control of their life. They are constantly doing everything to please others and are uncomfortable with themselves. It might not be that they are uncomfortable, it could even be that they are not that well rounded a person. Many highly ambitious people can sometimes get caught up with themselves. Often people in this situation need to balance things out a bit. Sometimes it can be a little bit dangerous even.
- Give yourself a pat on the back – if you’ve worked hard to try and achieve something give yourself credit where credit is due. There is no point beating yourself up all the time. Take a step back and look at how far you’ve come. Any kind of improvement is worth a bit of reflection. This is part of growth. Growth requires rests and pauses and reflection. This is all part of the process of building your self-esteem. It will leave you feeling better off. After all successes aren’t successes if you don’t enjoy them.
- Don’t worry so much – the importance of self-esteem is being able to commit yourself to the right things. To not worry and fret over things that are petty or really you have no control of. The person with self-esteem is the person who is well in command of their own ship. External forces rarely get the better of them. People who worry are people who are concerned for things they have no control of. This people are a massive drain to the other people around them. They emit the wrong kind of energy. Someone who is self determined will not be looking out for other people around them. Number one they will make sure that they are in a good condition, and in this way they will be doing the best favour for those around them. Only this way can someone be sure to have self-esteem.
It is worth repeating that by looking after yourself number one, you are going to be doing the greatest service to those around you. People are not going to be looking for advice, what they are going to be looking for is some leadership. The way you live your life is going to speak volumes far above any actual actions you perform. Self-esteem is tied into every aspect of your being. It does not stay still it is constantly moving up or down. Properly balance your priorities in life and your self-esteem levels are more likely to be okay.